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Mrs. Weirsdo Update

From time to time people want to see a picture of me. I recall RBUD hinting after the cruise.
Be careful what you wish for. Miraculously, our friend Rena, the artist and grandmother of my prize-winning former viola student, uploaded this picture of me that looks o. k., so now you can see what I look like.
I am trying out bows that Rena's granddaughter was thinking of buying on the granddaughter's beautiful new viola. Mall Diva is looking on from the left. On the wall to the left of the piano you can see Dr. Weirsdo's plaque for being Distinguished Honors Professor of the Year, and Mall Diva's two plaques for winning Alabama Music Teachers Association auditions on piano and violin, respectively (she didn't get a plaque for winning last year because she couldn't be on their recital because she was at Farther South University for Honors Piano Camp--no further word as yet on her FSU teacher's arrest for cyber solicitation, btw). Underneath the awards is a set of prints Mall Diva did representing the seasons. The paintings of the water lilies and Venice are by two different acquaintances. The papier maché leopard on the right is Mall Diva's work, a companion to Toyplayer's famous monument to Hobbes.

End of Show

Diamonelle startles Goth Maug, but only inflames his desire.
Originally uploaded by weirsdo

In the end, Diamonelle was forced to backhand Goth Maug in the face. Everyone went home happy.

Slitty Dress

Unfortunately the last outfit of the collection forced Diamonelle to comply. But Goth twitched the skirt aside even more on his own initiative, pulling the gown askew and causing Diamonelle to step awkwardly on her chiffon train at the beginning of her walk.

Show Some Leg!

Diamonelle grits her teeth and ignores him.
Originally uploaded by weirsdo

At this point Goth Maug began chanting, "Show some leg! Show some leg!" under his breath, but nevertheless audibly.

Demure, Country Look

A simple turn-down collar and turn-out hem give this dress a demure, country feel.

Marilyn Monroe-esque

Goth Maug checks out the Marilyn Monroe effect.
Originally uploaded by weirsdo

Funky Pearnet

Yes, Pearnet can do funky street fashion too!

Not with Goth

She is also about ready to slap Goth Maug upside the head.
Originally uploaded by weirsdo

Diamonelle is ready for a date.

Romantic Look

A shorter piece of Pearnet makes a lacy blouse, perfect with this romantic chiffon wrap skirt.

Hair Adds Whimsy to Work Outfit

Goth Maug wants to be the wind beneath Diamonelle's wings.
Originally uploaded by weirsdo

Wings pompado by Mall Diva.

Ready for Work

Ditch the chiffon, pull up the Pearnet and remold, and you're ready for the office!

Tongue of Flame

Goth Maug likes the look.
Originally uploaded by weirsdo

Body art, glitter, and "tongue of flame" updo by Mall Diva. Hair color by Bratz.

Prom Pearnet

With a glamorous chiffon bow atop a bouffant Pearnet skirt, Diamonelle is ready for the prom.

Hair & Makeup

Pearnet is elegant, light, and water repellant.
Originally uploaded by weirsdo

Halo do and body art by Mall Diva, flower tiara by Ripov.

Pearnet Elegance

Ready for after-hours fun.
Originally uploaded by weirsdo

Diamonelle goes from play clothes to elegant formal wear.

Accessorized Tutube

With the addition of a simple yet elegant cape and a flower tiara,

Inner Tutube Child

Diamonelle shed her hair wrap for this girlish look, complete with "inner tutube." Mall Diva's upswept "wild ponytails" do helps bring out Diamonelle's inner child, who is equally ready for a birthday party or a trip to the beach.

Mother's Day Interruption by Weirsdo

While Diamonelle appears in this girlish outfit,* I just want to say that Tubby Thighs is NOT her mother. Other questions from our comments will be answered later in "Ask Weirsdo" posts. Happy Mother's Day to Diamonelle's moms, whoever she is, and to all the other moms out there.

*Hair and body art by Mall Diva

Also in the spirit of Mother's Day, I want to say how shocked we all were to learn that Mall Diva's teacher from Farther South University's Honors Piano Camp last summer was arrested on April 28 and charged with five counts of soliciting sex from a minor over the Internet back in March of '08. This man is a distinguished musician who was building a career and had a wife and young child. In short he had everything to lose and quite possibly will lose it. Mall Diva had a very positive experience with him and did not notice anything improper in his behavior. He recently invited her to a music festival in Maine where he intended to teach this summer. We hope the police are being overzealous, but they have taken so long to build their case, with police in Kansas (where the teen was contacted) working with police in Florida, that we are afraid they have him dead to rights.
What does this have to do with Mother's Day? Well, we entrusted Mall Diva to this guy, so even the most careful mother can never be sure her child's associates are safe. Also, we feel for his wife, who is probably not having the greatest Mother's Day in the world, and this is just another reminder of how vigilant moms have to be about their children, especially on the Internet.

Brazen Disregard

Goth Maug paid no attention to his boss, and Belle Catley also brazenly continued to check out Diamonelle's outfit.

Admonishment

At this point General Arshmol/Ugluk (right) had to admonish Goth Maug (left) to keep his mind on his work. Her warning may not have been entirely disinterested. She herself later admitted to wondering if "Maug" would sound better than her other surnames after "General."

Cover-Up

In a flash, Diamonelle went from casual elegance to an informal beach cover-up, just by shedding her lowest piece of Pearnet. The hair wrap pulled down over the eyes gives her an exotic air of mystery.
Body art by Mall Diva.

Diamonelle Attracts Unsavory Attention

Celebrities put up with a lot.
Originally uploaded by weirsdo

Much as I vigorously deny that Tom and Icy's rude comments about Diamonelle's sexual activity have any validity, I have to admit that both Belle Catley and Goth Maug seemed very interested in this outfit. Diamonelle remained supremely unaware of their inappropriate ogling.

Inner Tube Look

This outfit features a sporty, turn up hem that shows off Diamonelle's shapely legs. The Pearnet rings can double as a flotation device.

Little Harvey Meets His End--or Does He?

Diamonelle bravely perseveres.
Originally uploaded by weirsdo

Little Harvey, meanwhile, started back to Ork, but was torn apart by dinosaurs before reaching home.
Nevertheless, sightings of the boy persisted, and many claimed to have heard his whiny voice and annoying laugh. Back home in Ork, Mrs. Banana renamed a younger sibling after Little Harvey, and he soon began to exhibit the same tendencies toward idiotic cheerfulness and persistent, vocal curiosity that had made his late brother anathema for miles around.
No one could explain the "Little Harvey phenomenon." At last he was classified as "reality optional," along with such oddities as the FOPkens, the Little Blue Men, and (pace Emrald) the Meekmoks.
Little Harvey's head was donated to the Arshmolean, where it can still be viewed today.

On with the Show

After a moment, Diamonelle went on with the show, turning up the bottom of her Pearnet skirt for a sporty look and bravely baring her stumps in solidarity with Petesville's wounded veterans.

Or Was He?

L-R: General Arshmol/Ugluk (background), Diamonelle (runway), Vivian, Little Harvey (?), Pinko, and Annie.